dreaming about an ex

What Does It Mean When You Dream About Your Ex Meaning: Taking A Deeper Look

An ex-dream is always one that pulls on your emotional body. You feel overcome with nostalgia, deep memories, and either positive and blissful feelings of warmth and love, or more negative inner realm sensations. 

Let’s look at 7 main dream meanings, plus the spiritual and biblical associations. 

7 Meanings of An Ex Dream

If you’ve ever asked yourself the question “Why do I keep dreaming about my ex?”, here’s what to know:

Looking back to the past

You’re looking back to the past, reflective, and nostalgic. Your psyche is showing you that you’re still holding onto something, but this isn’t necessarily suggesting something’s missing.

You could just be in a state of deep reflection, or feeling sentimental and introspective in this particular life cycle. 

A therapist would say that your psyche is trying to show you something about your previous connection. you might have unresolved feelings, or you could simply be reliving positive emotions and memories through your dreams.


Not all breakups are bad. If you kept a good relationship with your ex, dreaming about them could be showing you the power of love and forgiveness.

Regardless of who was in the wrong, how it ended, etc.. experiencing blissful and happy feelings in your dream shows that you left on good terms and that you experience warmth when taking a trip down memory lane.

It also implies that you’re very confident in your new relationship, if you’re coupled; you wouldn’t be having warm and fuzzy dreams with an ex if you weren’t content and truly in love, would you?

This dream is a sign of maturity, release, acceptance, and forgiveness, and having truly moved on. your current partner should be ecstatic! Especially if you feel open enough to talk about your dream with them. 

Living in regret

A not-so-positive dream message regarding dreaming about an ex years later is the possibility of living in regret. 

A common dream theme about an ex, feeling negative emotions about a past split could be your subconscious mind’s way of telling you that you haven’t fully healed. You’re still holding onto jealousy, regret, grief, unresolved pain, or disappointment. 

Your ex-partner may have been the apple of your eye, your sweetheart, and your soulmate. You’re still dreaming of them because you want to revisit the passion of your connection.

This is amplified further if the specific ex was your first love or someone you had to let go through immaturity, circumstances beyond your control, and events that were of no fault of your own. 

In this case, you’re likely thinking of how you could have done things differently. If so, ask yourself what the lesson is. What is your dream and the symbolism trying to tell you? 

Were you dealing with an abusive ex and you wish you stood up for yourself? Are you still feeling resentment for a cheating ex…? Negative feelings in the dream are direct insights into your true feelings.

It’s only when we explore our most authentic feelings that we can rise up, like a phoenix from the ashes. You have to go in and through to come out and up. Examine how the dream symbolism and imagery relate to real life, either a past or current cycle & chapter of your life. 

Feeling like something’s missing

You might be feeling like something is missing, and your psyche has consulted the dream symbolism to discover what this is. Soul-searching is common with an ex-dream. 

You have ties to the past, and your mindset might be thinking about an ex-girlfriend or old flame more than your current partner. There could be some unresolved issues.

This is all true, especially, if there are negative emotions around your breakup. A particular ex could have given you everything you needed and wanted, yet you were too young to appreciate what you had.

I for one know what it’s like to have met the perfect person, just not at the right time! Dream symbolism shows us how everything is cyclic, and how we have many different life chapters and stages to learn and evolve through. 

Alternatively, there may have been matters of infidelity, disloyalty, or unfaithfulness. You may feel like something’s missing now because you have emotional dissatisfaction. Either your ex cheated on you, or you weren’t loyal and completely committed.

There are many varying factors when it comes to dreaming of an ex. You must stay honest with yourself, that is if you wish to heal, grow, and mature for new love. 

Recognition of your life purpose 

Regardless of whether you were at odds or in perfect harmony, an ex-dream symbolizes finding the missing pieces of the puzzle. 

You’re able to discover the secrets of the maze, see through the veil of illusion, and discover your life purpose. 

Failures and wins in relationships teach us deeper truths about ourselves. An ex-partner could have supplied you with the keys to your ultimate growth, best life, or most mastered and whole self. 

You may not have been conscious of the profound lessons being shown to you, at the time. Yet, now, weeks, months, or even years later, that wisdom is coming up for recognition. 

Dreaming of an ex in any way, shape, or form, signifies learning valuable lessons and aligning with your most authentic self. Relationships serve as mirrors to our souls… Everyone is a reflection of us.

Thus, the pearls of wisdom you were needing to learn are coming up from your subconscious to your conscious mind. Your subconscious is sending you reminders, through imagery, symbolism, and specific dream scenarios, that can lead to your healing in waking life. 

Self-realization leads to self-actualization. Enlightenment is found in an ex-dream, which implies accepting the dark and light parts of yourself. You are likely being shown core parts of your shadow that need to be developed and embodied. 

Through the interplay of energies with your ex-lover or partner, you can receive glimpses into your life path, purpose, and greater destiny or mission.

Seeking integration 

A past relationship can bring you the closure and integration you need. An old break-up re-lived or witnessed in a dream is potentially showing you what you need to integrate for the best future relationships. 

Your current life situation is not complete, and there’s something from a recent ex or old partner you need to embody. We have many soulmates in life. We’re all students and teachers at some point in our lives…

Behaviors might need to be integrated, while other mindsets and actions might need to be let go of- released. A bad breakup can show you the parts of yourself you failed to master, the strengths you weren’t able to embody in the past.

A good breakup shows you the beautiful ways you act, and the qualities and strengths you were able to embody. How you acted in the past, your level of maturity, how kind and diplomatic or compassionate you were, etc. tells you about your character. 

So, examine what needs to be integrated and why. Observe whether the dream mood and tone were positive or negative, were there mainly positive feelings and emotions or negative ones?

Love teaches us so much about our holistic selves and core wounds. Through the specific dream scenario and messages wanting to come through, you will see directly into your soul’s deepest longings. 

Desiring change 

Past trauma is often reflected through ex-dreams, so this shows that you’re wanting change. You desire something new, something fresh, and a love that’s true!

Dreaming of tricky events and memories from a past relationship could signify distrust, severe frustration and conflict, or a nightmare relived in the dream space. Painful memories and emotions come through in dreams. 

Abusive relationships are something you may have escaped from in your past. A new relationship or current partner might have provided you with the love, affection, caring, sensitivity, and intimacy you might not have had in the past. 

A current relationship might not be up to par, therefore you’re looking back at your dating or relationship history to examine your likes. You can learn a lot from the dream space, specifically about what you do like compared to what you dislike (in your current real-life relationship).

A deeper meaning might be that your subconscious is asking you not to settle. You could very well have a larger mission in store, a soul purpose, or destined life plan.

And God or the Divine knows you need a partner to match your energy for your soul gifts and talents to shine through. Many of us are stagnated or blocked, not being able to complete important life chapters and cycles until later.

Because our partners or limited world view and beliefs relating to love are holding us down. We are not yet our fully evolved, mature, and integrated adult selves. This could be the case for you with an ex-dream.

On the other hand, you might be in a deeply happy space and the ex-dream is merely confirmation- a reminder- of how far you’ve come. Check-in with yourself, asking yourself if you’ve learned your lessons. 

Wishing, hoping, & praying… 

Waking hours and the thoughts, emotions, and feelings we have are often reflected in the dream worlds. If you’ve been longing for something more, if you feel unsatisfied, either emotionally, spiritually, or physically, this will be shown to you.

You can increase your susceptibility to dream symbolism and important messages by meditating more. Work on your intuition. 

Expanding your intuitive powers through meditation, self-healing, therapy, fasting, pineal gland cleansing foods, and psychic or spiritual development will help you in connecting to the rich imagery of the dream space.

You can even call on your guardian angels or spirit guides to help you. Consider working with a Lapis Lazuli gemstone to enhance your memory.

Lapis Lazuli is a powerful dream stone revered by ancient Egyptians due to its vivid dream-inducing states. It promotes and increases learning, memory, recall, psychic gifts, subconscious insights, ancient wisdom, and spiritual illumination.

It is perfect for enhancing psychic, intuitive, and clairvoyant gifts, aligning you with the Great Spirit and the subconscious and astral realms; where insights, guidance, and wisdom are vast.

Place a water-cleansed and sunlight-charged Lapis Lazuli under or next to your pillow at night. Set some intentions for connecting to your past and gaining insight. Clearly, something important wants to be shown! 

You can also use Amethyst, Angelite, or Celestite for similar effects. They all relate to the Third Eye and spiritual perception, but Lapis Lazuli is the sole ‘dream stone.’ 

Spiritual meaning of dreaming about your ex

The spiritual meaning of dreaming about your ex-boyfriend suggests you are missing the masculine assertive and dominant energy in your life. This is assuming he was a real man, with his inner divine masculine integrated.

Let’s assume he was a kingly and noble man, balanced and emotionally mature and grounded. The Spiritual meaning of this is that you need to integrate and harmonize your own masculine qualities, which include strength, logic, intellect, assertiveness, self-authority, and yang attributes.

If you’ve dreamed about an ex-girlfriend, the same is true for feminine qualities. The divine feminine aspect is missing from your life; nurturing, empathy, wisdom, compassion, gentleness, caring, sensitivity, and instincts that lead to deeper connection.

An ex-boyfriend generally represents missing an intellectual and psychological connection, while an ex-girlfriend dream symbolizes needing emotional and spiritual connections. Both can be representative of primal instincts and romance or physical union, in their own way. 

Additionally, dreaming about an ex suggests you’re not feeling whole inside- you’re seeking another to complete you. This is true for being both single and coupled up in a partnership. The Biblical meaning links here.

Biblical meaning of dreaming about your ex

Your soul, psyche, and innermost self require divine union. You may believe in Twin Flame love, or you could be a fierce believer in waiting until marriage, courtship, and only making love when you’ve found your soulmate.

The biblical meaning of this dream symbol is that you’ve transcended or are working towards transcending frivolity, promiscuity, and the games and playfulness of youth.

You want something committed… you are seeing with higher and more responsible, grounded, and mature eyes. Cheating, infidelity, the games of youth, love affairs and flings, and unfaithfulness no longer resonate with you.

The Bible teaches you should wait for sexual union until marriage. Whether you believe in this traditional notion or have similar views along the wavelength, there is deeper truth and meaning to be found. 

Consider exploring your beliefs around sex, intimacy, and marriage. The ex-dream signifies that you are in a state of self-evolution, upgrading your current belief system.

Or you’re simply maturing! So you want a partner and love life to reflect this older, wise, and less promiscuous or ungrounded version of yourself. You’ve matured and elevated spiritually, emotionally, and mentally, in other words. 

To conclude

To dream of an ex implies you’re heading towards self-mastery or self-evolution in some way. You are looking to your past to create a better future, and you’re open to introspection, self-evaluation, and contemplation to heal and learn.

This is a very positive dream omen, as long as you’re willing to keep an open mind and change, where needed.

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*image by peopleimages.com/depositphotos

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